By Guest Blogger: Billy Sunday Mars

Serotonin is the, “I feel safe and secure”- neuro-transmitter!
It is believed women require and use 6 times as much serotonin as men.
Did you know about 60 percent of women over 40 are on anti-depressants?
Sugary, starchy, fatty foods signal the brain and body to release serotonin and unbeknownst to many, that 60 percent of serotonin is actually produced in our gut. Because our gut is closely linked to our decision making area- (hence the terms gut check and gut feeling) – and reward center of our brain, the desire for sugary, starchy serotonin increasing foods can literally be “overwhelming”.

Our emotional brain, to which women have eight times the blood flow of men in times of real or perceived danger-, is many thousands of times stronger than our rational brain which- by the way, actually needs glucose (blood sugar) to function in good decision making -ouch! That’s a lot like needing your glasses to find your glasses! You know that sudden, often unexplainable occurrence of crankiness that creeps in women without warning? Well, we just explained it. This is the real culprit in the low blood sugar mood altering and ensuing couples- let’s say disagreements, ok arguments- that has unfortunately and prevent ably ruined many a relationship.

If someone’s decision making capacity is decreased, their choice of words to express themselves or their needs may be hampered. Their body and brain are on an emotional drive for food, without the rational brake center of their brain to help them. Do you realize how difficult this is for a woman – especially not realizing what or why this happens to her?

We all know- men and women, particularly the female and male brain -have their differences but, this one may be the most significant reason for the notable differences in female- male weight gain. The reason I say this is because in an attempt to increase serotonin, to increase their “subconscious” feeling of safety and security, women also often crave comfort foods. The problem with seeking serotonin through those released via comfort foods is, of course, the obvious caloric cost. Add to that the stress involved from “not feeling safe and secure, the subsequent release of the stress hormone cortisol which is notorious for creation and retention of belly fat and the “terrible trifecta” is complete.

• Low blood sugar
• Low brain brakes
• and last but not least -rather most important-
• the craving for the sugar –
• needed to help the brain stop the stressed out carb craving-
• caused by the feeling it needs to release the serotonin to create the feeling of safety and security it wanted in the first place.
• Which -BTW- typically comes in the form of foods that causes and or increase the belly fat kept on by the stress hormone cortisol.

Whew!

So how do you stop this vicious cycle from “Peddling out of control?”
On a regular basis, in regular meals start by choosing more, slow burning complex carbs. Next increase the fiber to carb ratio in your foods which makes you feel more full. When I say slow burning complex carbs, I mean vegetables, natural fruits, berries (for anti-oxidants), unrefined whole grains (though not too many) and occasionally sweet potatoes which, though higher in sugar, have higher fiber than regular potatoes. Also increase your protein intake. Protein helps balance blood sugar. I realize many women don’t like to eat too much meat so go get yourself some higher protein – low glycemic health bars and keep those bars in your cars, in your purse, in your draw at work or handy at home. Keep bags of almonds or other nuts handy. Good fats also help you to feel full. It is important to stay as far, far, far away from saturated fats and high fructose corn syrup as possible.  They not only hurt your body, they inhibit the very brain function needed to keep you from eating them.

Next, don’t slack on your sleep. When you sleep you produce leptin the fat and metabolism regulating hormone that tells you when you’re full. It also offers anti-aging and anti-inflammation benefits because the less sugar you have less inflammation which, as Dr. Oz puts it, is a major ager! Without it your appetite and drive for comfort foods can spin out of control and have you unwittingly careening into the cookie, cake, chips and ice cream aisles in your otherwise friendly food store. Speaking of which keeping it out of your cabinets and out of your fridge (not hidden behind other healthier foods in either) is a great way to help yourself out.

Also, sitting in our chairs or couch in our sedentary life or jobs is a literally damaging, not only to our bodies but our brains which need better blood flow and circulation to make better decisions. You can boost your metabolism and blood flow to your brain at the same time- not to mention release some endorphins and, oh by the way serotonin itself, as well as dopamine can be released during exercise.
Last but not least, being the author of Fit for Love, I have to say that, you guessed it- the number one, the numero uno, way to release feel good chemicals into your system is none other than that incredible climactic occurrence known as “the Big O!” Yes, the Big O is your best insurance against being O shaped! Aside from the rush and flow of feel good chemicals, not the least of which is serotonin, you also release growth hormones that increase your metabolism making it easier for you to stay young, slim and trim and if that isn’t a collective kick in depression’s oppressive pants, I don’t know what is–and you?

Yes, true, true of course I saved the ultimate climactic serotonin creating crescendo for last.
Consider the previous the foreplay most men typically forget.

Blessings to all of you!
You now have an arsenal of methods to “Stop Stressing Now!”

For More Information On Billy Sunday Mars, please visit: http://www.billysundaymars.com/

If you’ve found this website helpful, please click the Donate button.
The amount you donate is entirely up to you.
PLEASE CONSIDER…

If the information on this site helps you and you’d like to make a donation to StopStressingNow.com (to educated people about HIV), please click on the button below to make a contribution.
It looks like times have been tough on a lot people. But the beautiful thing is that people are still giving what they can. Sometimes it’s $5. Sometimes it’s $10. It’s always touching – the sincerity of our tribe. No matter what you can afford, we’ll hook it up with someone who truly needs it most. Money should never get in the way of our devotion to the cause.

Spread Love, not the virus!
I’m grateful for your support.

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

Have you ever wondered what you should do if you suspect your mate is cheating?

It happens to us all. 

Currently, a Google search on “Infidelity” shows 4,230,000 web pages on this topic. Chances are, you have probably read a good amount of “How to tell if your spouse is cheating” or “What to do if you suspect your spouse is cheating” articles.

This is a little different.

My approach to detecting, preventing and surviving infidelity is a bit unusual by most, so called, conventional standards.

First things first…

Everyone is innocent – until proven otherwise.

Suspicion is NOT proof.

Finding “clues” and NO proof is circumstantial at best. And as reliable as your intuition may be – it’s still NOT proof.

Circumstantial “evidence” is not enough to convict in a court of law and it should not be enough to convince you either.

One of the biggest mistakes I see people make against their spouse is accepting “suspicious behavior” as proof of unfaithful behavior.

Jumping to conclusions or allowing the jealousy demon to whisper in your ears will only torture you.

The key is to stay calm and stay in the present. Like any good police detective, you have to be patient, watch, wait and observe. You have to become the “lead detective” in your own life. The only way to achieve this kind of rational observation is to keep seeing your partner AS innocent, until proven otherwise. Sometimes it takes time for the truth to reveal itself. Trust in this process and know that you will be okay either way.

Expect the best while preparing for the worst.

Most people do just the opposite. They don’t prepare at all. They just expect to find the worst and jump ahead of everything. The secret is to reverse this order of importance. Expect the best behavior from your partner. Expect they are behaving honorably behind your back. Expect they are keeping their promises. Expect they want to live impeccably and TELL THEM this is what you see and expect in them.

I have seen this work wonders in many relationships! Even when a spouse may have been tempted or thought of being lured into temptation, they find themselves wanting to live up to their partner’s trusting “vision” of them.

Acting contrary to this image of impeccability no longer feels right. Also by doing this, many wayward partners have broken down and confessed some kind of infidelity – be it emotional, physical or otherwise. This kind of self-directed admittance is always the best because the chances of healing and making a breakthrough are substantially higher.

While it’s true that you always want to expect the best of yourself and your partner, you must also be practical and prepare for the worst case scenario.

“Steven, how do I prepare for the worst?”

By being willing to ask yourself the tough questions and being just as willing to hear the truth (no matter what that may be).

Do you suspect that your significant other is cheating? I can help you find the truth you deserve. Simply give me a call by clicking on the call button below and you’ll be connected with me personally, privately and 100% anonymously through AT&T. I will not have your number and you do not have mine. The system connects us both. I have helped thousands and I can help you through this difficult time.

I can bring you INSTANT clarification in any area that is affecting you,

I’ll help you through any problem you may have.

Non-Judgmental, Open minded conversation with someone who cares.

On a clean sheet of paper, draw two columns.

On the left side, make a list of your worst fears. For example…He/she falls in love and leaves. He/she gets HIV and brings it home to you. You become a struggling, single parent. You end up alone. You feel humiliated, etc.

On the right side, reframe all your fears into something positive: For example: Next to your fear of being abandoned, you might write, “Because I have family and friends to count on, it is impossible for me to be alone.” Or, next to your fear of being humiliated, you could write, “I have done nothing wrong. I will not accept shame.”

Why is this worksheet important?

I have discovered that most people rush into confrontation, hiring PI’s to spy for proof, without first being emotionally ready to deal with the truth. I am convinced that taking time to face your fears gives you the necessary power and self-confidence to handle whatever emerges.

If you feel a strong suspicion that your partner is cheating, DO the emotional worksheet ahead of time. Get a grip on your fears so they don’t blind side you.

The more they have to lose – the more they have to lie.
Here’s the reality of infidelity. It’s not the “sex” or loss of attention that hurts the most.

It’s the deception.

YOU confront – and – THEY deny. YOU cry, beg and plead for the truth and THEY lie. You promise to work it out, to be kind and patient and NOT to judge them.  And yet, THEY still lie.

Well, there’s good news and bad news about the lying game. The bad news is this: The more a person has to lose, the more they have to lie to cover up. Lying (just like denial) is a tactic to protect against the threat of emotional pain.

In other words, the majority of liars lie to protect themselves from being hurt. To them, it is a self-preservation technique.Am I saying that lying through your teeth to save yourself the headache of owning up to your actions is excusable?

Perish the thought!

What I AM saying is that lying, when you have a lot to lose, is standard defense. It is not the best choice. It is not the strongest choice. It is simply the lazy and cowardly choice.

Once you are aware that lying is a defense mechanism, it frees you from ever being trapped in a cheater’s lies. You can see “through” them rather than trying to understand them. You can condemn the “lie” and not the liar. You can afford to be gracious once you see it as a “weakness” rather than a personal attack against you.

If your partner is cheating, then he or she is lying. Not just to themselves, but to the rest of their world.

Now, you may be thinking to yourself: Steven, won’t they be getting away with these lies?

No, not at all.

There is a high price to pay for lying. It robs people of their own sense of personal power. It steals their inner joy and destroys their feeling of freedom and self-respect. It almost always eventually leads to a feelings of isolation and loneliness.

The universe you and I live in continually seeks to balance itself. Deception NEVER fulfills the deceiver. Lies ONLY trap the liar. There are absolutely NO REWARDS on earth for lying to yourself or others.

The ultimate price for lying and deceiving others? Losing your own happiness (a pretty hefty price, don’t you think?).

Creating a space for honesty.

People ask me all the time…Should they hire a private detective, put spy software on their partner’s computer, or engage in other “covert” infidelity detection methods.

Here’s my answer.

In certain rare instances, all of those techniques have a place. However, I am a firm believer in taking the high road whenever possible.

If you believe your partner is being deceptive and you use deceptive methods to discover the deception, then I have to ask — who is more deceptive?

On becoming a deception detective.

The first rule to take into consideration is that ALL cheaters WILL lie. After they have finished lying – they will promptly start lying again. It’s not personal. It’s just the nature of the beast. So how do you go about finding the truth – when so many lies are the norm?

To catch a cheat, it may first look like you must fight fire with fire (deception with deception).Hold on. Before you take the low road, know there is another way: I call it preparing a space for honesty.

This plays a big role in the marriage wellness coaching program that I provide for couples who are facing this kind of uncertainty. It’s based on the premise that Honesty is a two-way street:

1. You let your partner know it’s “safe” to be honest.
2. You let your partner have “amnesty” to be truly honest.

Many of us say we want our partners to be totally honest (so long as they say the things we want to hear). But the moment they don’t, we react and instantly fly into a rage.

If you want to hear the truth, you must be able to handle the truth.

Most people cry fowl when I explain this concept to them. They say you should tell the truth regardless of the consequences. While I agree that this would be ideal, it’s just not realistic.

People will only be as honest with you as you allow them to be.

The reason most people lie? To protect themselves from the threat of danger or emotional pain. So, what if we removed that threat? What if we made it so that speaking the truth created HIGH positive rewards? How much more likely are they to be honest – voluntarily?

A lot more!

You see my point?

One last thing…

Do you feel you truly have reasons to suspect your partner is having an affair?

If the answer is “yes”, then please don’t deny your feelings. Don’t bury your head in the sand. Time is not on your side. After years of watching how the dominoes fall in the area of infidelity discovery, I would say, chances are very good that you’re feelings are correct. But what can you do about it?

There’s got to be a better way than spying on your partner or going out and finding your own private detective. I believe it’s better to get to the truth voluntarily. Don’t you?

Why not let me teach you my 4-step strategy for inspiring true confessions. You’ll be amazed at how well it works. You will learn how to inspire more honest communication, better handle jealousy, inspire more trust and stop your relationship from getting worse.

I want to help you become aware of more possibilities and options you have. Let’s work together to decide what action steps you should take next. If this sounds good to you, then I invite you to click on any one of the following three links to get started now.

Do You Need Some Advice? 

Do you suspect that your significant other is cheating? I can help you find the truth you deserve. Simply give me a call by clicking on the call button below and you’ll be connected with me personally, privately and 100% anonymously through AT&T. I will not have your number and you do not have mine. The system connects us both. I have helped thousands and I can help you through this difficult time.

I can bring you INSTANT clarification in any area that is affecting you,

I’ll help you through any problem you may have.

Non-Judgmental, Open minded conversation with someone who cares.

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

Holiday Weight Gain and Estrogen – Billy Sunday Mars

I watched an episode of Doctor Oz recently where he had a group of women on who were at their emotional end about how to get rid of their belly fat. It is very difficult, beyond psychologically, for a woman to so negatively watch her body change so let’s first take a moment here to empathize. Typically as a woman’s weight goes up, her self-esteem, her self-worth, goes down. Beyond anything a husband or boyfriend can say, for her, walking into a store and asking for- “the next size up” from last time- can be emotionally traumatic. Try to understand that when a woman gains weight around the middle it changes her symmetry which her system, at a subconscious level, knows is detrimental beyond immediate health, to her attractiveness to a partner or potential partner. Evolutionary Psychology has made it quite clear that it is not so much a younger but a healthier partner that is sought by a potential male mate. As a woman ages her hip to waist ratio, the golden measurement, changes. She tends to get thicker around her waist and loses muscle and muscle tone in her hips, further influencing a change in the youthfulness of her appearance. No amount of patronizing from friends or even a devoted mate can change the look she wants to receive from admirers, especially that devoted mate.

So what happens, especially during the holiday season to make what is supposed to be “the most wonderful, the most feared time of the year”? Long before your clothes begin to fit tighter around the waist you may notice you start feeling emotionally closed in and closed down during the colder months. Seasonal Affective disorder may play a part in this but more so, as mammals, we are designed to hibernate and slow down for the winter months. As a result we sometimes put on “the seasonal slow- down” pounds. Consequently, this makes it an especially untimely time for all those Holiday Parties.

Also, for many the Holidays are a time of reflection and not all of our memories are good. Family issues, tough times when you wish you could give more and often a feeling of sadness for not achieving things or worse being who and how you wanted to be sneak in and make it difficult to keep up the happy face you put on for others. So when you get to go to Holiday Parties, some of which you don’t really want to be at, you find yourself eating “not be to feel good but to not feel bad”! This is when people, especially women crave carbs! How many of you can honestly say when you feel bad you crave broccoli?

One of the reasons this takes place is that when you’re stressed, as most people are, during and after the Christmas rush, your brain is in overload and tries to keep up by over fueling itself with glucose that usually comes in the form of cookies and cakes (not saying I don’t enjoy that myself), rather than the much hallowed complex carbs which are not so simple to stick to during our difficult moments. There is a reason why what we choose are called comfort foods, especially during the holiday. They seem to be most readily available and right on the heels of Thanksgiving which we are still somewhat (excuse the expression) still “stuffed from”.

Left- overs anyone?

Another problem that affects women is the now –but little- known scientific fact that when a woman’s ovaries reduce their production of estrogen, their body purposely adds belly fat from which to draw w estrogen. That’s right, beyond keeping down your calorie count; you’ve got to be concerned with keeping your estrogen count up. Ever wonder why HRT’s put on belly fat? Your body knows what it needs, wants what it wants and will do what it needs to do to get it even to the extent of telling your brain- go ahead- have another cookie! And, in case you forgot, stress, especially due to all the chaotic running around during the holidays, causes you to produce more cortisol. Cortisol, as you may recall, also causes you to put on belly fat. Like you really need one more thing to deal with during the Season to be Jolly?

So what can we do about this? What can we do when we are at all these parties and we are under, not only peer pressure but our own inner stress? What can we do when everything we are has got us on a search and destroy mission for all things sweet, sticky, gooey or crunchy? If you want to stay “Fit for Love” for the Holidays you need to start thinking inside out. The answer, “Fill up before you go out”! Start where it all begins, not in your stomach but in your-you guessed it, your mind. Your mind is actually designed to get your body to do what it thinks it needs for survival- at least temporarily. Start smart and eat at least a somewhat healthier snack to provide little room for the doom and gloom belt loop expanders of the buffet table. Try watching some comedies or comedians to take off the edge rather than using “the happy punch”. Remember the more punch you drink, the more punches you may have add to your belt.

As my effort is to try to keep you “Fit for Love” remind you,

“Tis better to BE Dessert than Eat Dessert!”

Here’s to a Happy New You!

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

Can you believe it’s already the end of the year?

It has become a ritual between Christmas and New Year’s for me to review what I have accomplished over the previous year and make a written plan of what I want to accomplish in the coming year.  I view a written plan much like a road map. It shows me the way, heads me in the right direction and keeps me on course.

Do you do anything like that?

Written plans are viewed by many of the most productive people I know as the power tool for achievement, the magic bridge to your goal. Alan Lakein, the author of books on time control said, “Planning is bringing the future into the present so you can do something about it now.”

If you want to make a written plan, some of the questions you might begin with are:

Where do I want to be three months from now; six months from now; or a year from now?
How am I going to get there?
What do I have to do to get myself from where I am to where I want to be?
What’s the first, small step I can take to get moving?

Stephen Brennan said, “Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a written plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success.”

You will often be surprised how often the circumstances which will confront you, will fit in with plans you have laid out in advance.

Bernard Baruch, an adviser to many US Presidents, said, “Whatever failures I have known, whatever errors I have committed, whatever follies I have witnessed in private and public life have been the consequence of action without thought.”

Do something different this year and plan 2012 the way you want it to be, then we can make it happen.
Change is possible.

*** Remember, If you do what you have always done, you will continue to get what you always have had.
If you need some help planning your course for the new year, I am so very happy to help.

Just give me a call.

To your success,
I look forward to speaking with you again very soon,
Steven Diamond

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

They are cheating Red Flag # 2 —Shifts in Behavior

Another big clue your partner is keeping a secret is when they have a noticeable “shift” in their behavior, interests or attitude.

Keeping in mind that many things can cause a person’s behavior to shift. It’s not always infidelity. It could be things like a new job, relocation, menopause, illness, financial stress, etc. But when there are no obvious reasons (and when everything else is relatively calm) shifts in behavior become a big red flag.

What follows are examples of some noticeable changes in behavior that clued some of our clients in on the fact that their partner was cheating.

CLASSIC CHEATERS’ BEHAVIOR

• Staying up late and on the computer for hours.
• A new, unfamiliar hobby.
• Noticeable mood swings (being short-tempered, distant, defensive).
• Acting differently towards family and friends (being vague, distracted, or “in their own world“)
• Suddenly developing a Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde personality (one minute being more attentive to you, the next minute being mean or cold for no apparent reason).
• New interest in exercise, diet, fashion, colognes or perfumes.
• Being overly earnest (having a sudden willingness to run errands, when they usually would not).
• Hyper attention to personal hygiene (carrying breath fresheners, gum, mints, etc.)
• Higher than normal desire for sex (including new sense of adventurousness.)
• Little or NO desire for sex (often blaming stress, finances, deadlines, or work-related excuses).

All people do develop “patterns” of behavior.

Naturally, after living with another person for a long period of time, most of us will begin to learn (and “pickup”) on our partner’s patterns.

This happens on both a conscious (and subconscious) level. When people begin acting differently with no apparent reason, there is usually a hidden reason.
Do you suspect that your significant other is cheating? I can help you find the truth you deserve. Simply give me a call by clicking on the call button below and you’ll be connected with me personally, privately and 100% anonymously through AT&T. I will not have your number and you do not have mine. The system connects us both. I have helped thousands and I can help you through this difficult time.

I can bring you INSTANT clarification in any area that is affecting you,

I’ll help you through any problem you may have.

Non-Judgmental, Open minded conversation with someone who cares.

Click here to read the first article: http://www.stopstressingnow.com/2011/10/number-one-warning-signs-of-a-cheating-spouse/

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

Why are so many people blind sided by infidelity and cheating?

Why do so many betrayed partners never see it coming? Why are so many wayward partners not prepared to handle temptation?

Looking back, we ask ourselves: were there signs, red flags, glaring evidence we should have seen coming?

The answer is almost always: Yes and No.

Here’s why. In almost all cases of infidelity, the betrayed partner indeed has warning signs, but usually fails to recognize them in time. And what good is a warning sign if you don’t see it and understand its meaning? Not much.

Hindsight is 20/20.

When they look back AFTER the discovery, people tell me they clearly recognized a number of signs.

So what are the warning signs, clues, or patterns that signal a partner/spouse is being unfaithful to you?

Red Flag #1

Your Own Intuition

What is triggering these feelings?

Your intuition. I call it our “invisible” deception detection system.

Our intuition does not depend on logic (the conscious mind). It relies on energy and information (the subconscious mind).

The conscious mind is extremely limited in how much information it can draw from and process. 

However, your subconscious mind does draw from ALL available information. (tone, past, patterns of behavior, body language, etc.)

So, while someone may try to convince us with logic that everything is okay…our intuition tells us the truth.

In hindsight, almost 90% of betrayed spouses recalled a moment of unease – a “hunch” their partners were involved with someone outside of their relationship. This almost always happens.

Why is this?

I believe it’s because…

…all affairs introduce deception.

Whether they are good liars or not, cheaters’ behavior is affected to some degree. 
They may try to “over correct” by giving you more attention (spontaneous gifts, offering to do housework, etc.) or they might completely withdraw (or somewhere in between) but either way…deception “shifts” personal energy.

Everyone has intuition.  The more sensitive and aware a person is, the more reliable their intuition becomes.

By the way, intuition is NOT foolproof.

You should be aware of the difference between suspicion and intuition.

Suspicion is based on specific clues (unexplained absences, unusual phone calls, etc.). This is often circumstantial evidence.

Intuition on the other hand, requires no evidence. It’s a gut feeling and is purely abstract. That’s why it’s usually the earliest warning sign you get.

Do you suspect that your significant other is cheating? I can help you find the truth you deserve. Simply give me a call by clicking on the call button below and you’ll be connected with me personally, privately and 100% anonymously through AT&T. I will not have your number and you do not have mine. The system connects us both. I have helped thousands and I can help you through this difficult time.

I can bring you INSTANT clarification in any area that is affecting you,

I’ll help you through any problem you may have.

Non-Judgmental, Open minded conversation with someone who cares.

Call it a “gut” feeling.  It’s that indescribable “knowing” that something just isn’t right.  There are times when you may not be able to pinpoint the cause. But somewhere around your solar plexus, you keep getting a gnawing feeling of uneasiness. Inside you just know…something is wrong!

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

FREE MINUTES FOR FIRST TIME CALLERS!

* Read the comments down below of actual callers!*

I can bring you INSTANT clarification in any area that is affecting you,

I’ll help you through any problem you may have.

Non-Judgmental, Open minded conversation with someone who cares.

It’s 100% Private & Confidential. Click Here To Learn More!

______________________________________________________________________________________

“I have spoken to many advisers, and Steven is absolutely the best. He has an amazing ability to guide you past your own fears and projections while providing insight into yourself and others. Please don’t hesitate to call him! – Karen”

________________________________________________________________________________________

You are NOT alone. Read the comments down below of actual callers! I’ve helped thousands, and I can help you.

Hello, I’m Steven Diamond and I really can help you.

I am honest, Open minded and very non-judgmental and can talk openly with you about any subject of concern. I can answer any and all questions regarding your LIFE and I am a specialist in dealing with guilt, anger and teaching you how to make your life and relationships work, getting you to the place you need to be for happiness to exist.

WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?

Answer questions on dating, sex, cyber-affairs, marriage, divorce, commitment, reconstituted families, friendships, cohabitation, same sex, office romance, infidelity, internet or long distant connections, guilt, anger and stress or anxiety issues.

Sometimes, we just need a real person that we can trust to lend an ear without interrupting so we can get our situation off our chest. Someone who will understand. Someone who isn’t just trying to tell you what to do. I am that person, I really do care about people and I want to hear from you.

DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING RING A BELL?

1. • confused about a relationship?
2. • what’s the #1 relationship mistake?
3. • how do I stop an obsession?
4. • sexual fetishes/fantasies or turned on to porn more than your partner?
5. • why am I so frustrated by mixed messages?
6. • how do I deal with a broken heart?
7. • how do I say no and set limits without alienating others?
8. • how do I recognize Mr. or Miss Right?
9. • how do I know if the relationship is going anywhere?
10. • what if my partner wants out and I don’t?
11. • what does the opposite sex want in/out of bed?
12. • why am I addicted to drugs, sex, psychics, gambling, tarot card readers?
13. • how can I learn to act in my own best interest without hurting others?
14. • how come chasing a man backfires even in the 21st century?
15. • fill in the blank with your own question_________.

I understand.I know how to help you end your struggle and find the peace you seek.

It’s not as difficult as you may think, in fact, it’s a lot easier than living the life of torment you experience today. But it takes true courage. Courage isn’t always a Lion’s roar. Sometimes, it’s just your heart telling you that you have the will to find a better tomorrow.

Real courage is in Taking Action – TODAY! Call me right now.

Don’t be afraid. Click on the phone icon below and call me right now.

If I am on a call with someone else who needs to talk, you can arrange a call back through our system.

Hear this loud and clear – there are no “magic pills” in this world. No magic wand to wave your anxiety, stress, panic and depression away.

That just is not reality. Anyone who tells you different is not telling the truth.

Relationships are difficult.

When you learn a life changing skill that really works, it’s with you forever and no one can take that away from you. Not ever.
Think about it.

My sincere hope is that you will call me and freely share your thoughts, your ideas and your life experience on this safe, anonymous call for the benefit of your own life.

You CAN live a better life free of the toxic relationships, panic, worry, guilt and anxiety and all the endless mind chatter that never stops in your brain. I can show you how. It’s easier then you think.
Call me right now. I am a real person who has been there. I understand and I care.

Take a moment and read through some of the comments of others who have called.

You have to make the call.

Do it right now, you’ll be glad you did.

(We accept Visa, MasterCard, American Express and all credit cards emblazoned with a Visa or MasterCard logo, or any other card that has a Visa or MasterCard logo, such as a debit card, ATM card, or check card.)

24 hours a day / seven days a week!

I look forward to speaking with you soon.

Steven Diamond – Founder: StopStressingNow.Com

WHO IS STEVEN DIAMOND?

Steven Diamond is a thought leader, author, and entrepreneur who has also achieved top honors as a professional speaker in a thriving international career that has spanned more than 40 countries around the globe.

You may have seen him on TV talk shows like: NBC’s “The Jane Pauley Show” and hundreds of other radio, TV and media appearances.

Steven’s unique background not only as a life coach, but as a professional mentor and life long student of behavioral sciences has developed his powerful ability to address life issues from an integrated and comprehensive level.

In 2000 Steven Diamond began a decade long journey to answer some of life’s most mysterious questions, eventually culminating in the creation of his popular website and the first in a series of acclaimed audio courses that have become known around the world for their unique, simple, yet effective approach.
Steven has donated thousands of free audio courses and copies of his book “OCD: A Life Among Secrets” to both returning Veterans and actual Soldiers in the field overseas through his “Soldiers At Peace” Project.

Gene Simmons

Today, Steven speaks to groups large and small creating a transformational experience that is evocative and gently amusing. One that explores the full humor and pathos of the human condition.

Charo

“Everyone gets down in the dumps at times, or we feel demotivated and sometimes even lose our self confidence. What I do is beyond just inspiration. I teach people real life skills that have changed my life. I have been there and lived through some really tough times. It’s that wisdom that I share to help people reconnect to the person they have always felt they were inside.” – Steven Diamond

Tom Jones

I am a personal life phone consultant specializing in relationship advice, communication skills,  telephone life coaching,  romantic relationship advice,  long distance relationship advice, advice on long distance relationships, relationship advice men, relationship advice women,  life success coach, life success coaching, successful life coaching, phone advice.. Don’t delay, Call Me Right Now!

Richard Simmons

Colin Farrell

Sugar Ray Leonard

Criss Angel

* Read the comments down below of actual callers!*

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

By Guest Blogger: Billy Sunday Mars

The what? Yes, you read it right, the title is the “Relaxed Rush”!

Is that possible, to rush and relax at the same time? Yes, it’s not only possible, it’s necessary.

I know what you’re thinking, you’re a guy, how would you know? I may not know the specifics but let’s take a shot at it. As a woman, let’s say a mom, you’ve got kids to get ready for school, soccer practice, violin lessons and did they do their homework? What about work- 9 to 5 plus- emphasis on the plus.

There’s bills that have to be paid. Gotto also try to fit in a work out so you can fit in the dress you just bought. Hair and make-up take up time that guys don’t have to worry about too. And how am I supposed to eat right running at 100 miles per hour? Close? From my experience, I’ve learned, “The fastest way to a mistake is to hurry up and get there!” Then, oh, by the way, then you have to do whatever it was you were trying to do in the right and fast in the first place a second time, or more.

With all this happening, how can I suggest relaxing in any way shape or form? Hey, I see how difficult it is for you. I feel for you. So the best thing that I can do for you is tell you, how you feel matters most- and stressing out does not feel good and it’s not good for you. Being in a state of distress is a bio-chemical physiological, psychosomatic bomb for your body and being. It literally eats you alive from the inside out. This means you are literally “killing yourself” in order, not only to make a living, but to live at all. Life presents a lot of, not only unnecessary but necessary pressure, let’s call it resistance. Yeah right, tell me about it? Ok I will. When I lived in China, my teachers taught me the more pressure, the more resistance, the more your need to relax to counterbalance it. Oh, like that’s possible? Yes, and again, necessary! Picture driving your car on the highway, doesn’t the slightest turn at the high speed make a big difference as opposed to in a parking lot? Even when you step on the gas while driving, the car speeds up not you. You don’t start moving faster in the car to keep up with the car. In fact, there is a Taoist understanding that no matter how fast the outer part of a wheel turns, the hub, the center must remain still. So there, that is the lesson, be still in the center. You’ve got to be as cool as an Oreo cookie- – because what makes an Oreo unique is its cool center with darkness all around it. In fact it’s so cool they made it Double Stuff cool. And that’s what I want for you. –With milk of course- Newman O’s with Soy for the vegetarians! Where was I? Oh yes….

Keeping cool in the center…Is it more difficult for a woman to keep cool? As a matter of fact, yes. As I’ve mentioned. A woman’s fight or flight center is half the size of the man’s because she was designed to take care of the home not emergencies. She does, however, have eight times the blood flow to that area as a man. This means trouble is turbo charged in the female brain. Her mind moves faster during and her poor body has to try and keep up. Plus, she has right brain creative capacity o she- ready- accessorizes the problem. This is why the “to do list” grows so fast. A woman’s mind not only as a constant to do list, she has a back up to do list and a refill for both of those ready because of the way her brain is set up. When she is stressed, unlike a man (and a man’s brain is pretty simple compared to a woman’s) who’s brain, in overwhelm, says sit down rest and rethink it, a woman’s brain says do more to take your mind off it. Yup, when stressed, a woman’s brain says do more to take your mind off of how much you have to do! It is important to realize this so you can work with yourself by saying, oh, I see what’s happening. It’s just my mind telling me this but it’s not really true. It’s just because I’m stressed.

So, how do you relax during a rush?

Step 1) Notice you are rushing. Notice the erratic energy you are investing into what you are doing. Here now, take the emphasis off of what you are doing and put it on how you are being while you are doing- whatever it is. Notice your shoulders. Are they up around your ears? Take a breath- inhale, then exhale and lower them while lifting your chin and as you do that, soften your stare! Then while your chin is lifted- like in CPR, take a deep breath with your airway open. Exhale slowly and as you do, visualize yourself sinking “back into your being”!

Step 2) Proceed with your, “process” remembering, whatever you’re doing is a process. And, as the journey is the destination, the process is the prize. Sink into getting better at the process and the prize will come better and faster on its’ own.

Step 3) Take a look at your to do list. Trade in the “to do” for an absolutely “must do”. Set it up into bite size mini lists and fold it over so only the few you must do are showing and the ones you “can also do” after the must do are showing. When you’re done with what you must do- if there’s time- move into what you can also do.

Step 4) Take what’s next on the list inject it into Step 2!

Step 5) Love yourself throughout!

For More Information On Billy Sunday Mars, please visit: http://www.billysundaymars.com/

If you’ve found this website helpful, please click the Donate button.
The amount you donate is entirely up to you.
PLEASE CONSIDER…

If the information on this site helps you and you’d like to make a donation to StopStressingNow.com (to educated people about HIV), please click on the button below to make a contribution.
It looks like times have been tough on a lot people. But the beautiful thing is that people are still giving what they can. Sometimes it’s $5. Sometimes it’s $10. It’s always touching – the sincerity of our tribe. No matter what you can afford, we’ll hook it up with someone who truly needs it most. Money should never get in the way of our devotion to the cause.

Spread Love, not the virus!
I’m grateful for your support.

To View All Of Steven’s Video Blogs

Click Here
http://www.stopstressingnow.com/category/guest-bloggers/steven-diamond-video-blogs/

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

Oniomania, compulsive shopping (or what’s more commonly referred to as shopping addiction), is perhaps the most socially reinforced of the behavioral addictions.

We are surrounded by advertising, telling us that buying will make us happy. We are encouraged by politicians to spend as a way of boosting the economy. And we all want to have what those around us have –- consumerism has become a measure of our social worth.

Although widespread consumerism has escalated in recent years, shopping addiction is not a new disorder. It was recognized as far back as the early nineteenth century, and was cited as a psychiatric disorder in the early twentieth century.

Almost everyone shops to some degree, but only about 6% of the U.S. population is thought to have a shopping addiction. Usually beginning in the late teens and early adulthood, shopping addiction often co-occurs with other disorders, including mood and anxiety disorders, substance use disorders, eating disorders, other impulse control disorders, and personality disorders.
Normal Shopping v. Shopping Addiction

So what makes the difference between normal shopping, occasional splurges, and shopping addiction? As with all addictions, shopping becomes the person’s main way of coping with stress, to the point where they continue to shop excessively even when it is clearly having a negative impact on other areas of their life. As with other addictions, finances and relationships are damaged, yet the shopping addict feels unable to stop or even control their spending.

Are YOU addicted to shopping? Take this little quiz!

1.    Do you often find yourself spending more time and/or money buying and shopping than you wanted to?

2.    Do you often go on buying binges?

3.    Has excessive shopping resulted in financial difficulties for you?

4.    Do you sometimes feel that something inside you, beyond your control, pushes you to shop and buy?

5.    Do you hide your purchases and shopping habits from family or friends?

6.    Are your relationships with family and/or friends suffering because of your buying habits?

7.    Do you feel “high” when you go on a buying binge?

8.    Have you tried to stop over-shopping but been unable to?

9.    Do you often feel compelled to buy something even though you really don’t need it and can’t afford the item?

10.    Are you not opening your mail or answering your phone because you don’t want to face the consequences of your buying?

* If you answered YES to six or more, you could have a serious problem that needs professional help.

The Controversy of Shopping Addiction

Like other behavioral addictions, shopping addiction is a controversial idea. Many experts balk at the idea that excessive spending can constitute an addiction, believing that there has to be a psychoactive substance which produces symptoms such as physical tolerance and withdrawal for an activity to be a true addiction.

There is also some disagreement among professionals about whether compulsive shopping should be considered an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), impulse control disorder (like pathological gambling), mood disorder (like depression), or addiction. It has been suggested that, along with kleptomania (compulsive stealing) and binge-eating disorder (BED), it be viewed as an impulsive-compulsive spectrum disorder.
How Is Shopping Addiction Like Other Addictions?

There are several characteristics that shopping addiction shares with other addictions. As with other addictions, shopping addicts become preoccupied with spending, and devote significant time and money to the activity. Actual spending is important to the process of shopping addiction; window shopping does not constitute an addiction, and the addictive pattern is actually driven by the process of spending money.

As with other addictions, shopping addiction is highly ritualized and follows a typically addictive pattern of thoughts about shopping, planning shopping trips, and the shopping act itself, often described as pleasurable, ecstatic even, and as providing relief from negative feelings. Finally, the shopper crashes, with feelings of disappointment, particularly with the him/herself.

Compulsive shoppers use shopping as a way of escaping negative feelings, such as depression, anxiety, boredom, self-critical thoughts, and anger. Unfortunately, the escape is short-lived. The purchases are often simply hoarded unused, and compulsive shoppers will then begin to plan the next spending spree. Most shop alone, although some shop with others who enjoy it. Generally, it will lead to embarrassment to shop with people who don’t share this type of enthusiasm for shopping.

What If I Have a Shopping Addiction?

Research indicates that around three-quarters of compulsive shoppers are willing to admit their shopping is problematic, particularly in areas of finances and relationships. Of course, this may reflect the willingness of those who participate in research to admit to having problems. Fortunately, although not yet well-researched, compulsive shopping does appear to respond well to a range of treatments, including medications, self help books, self help groups, financial counseling, and cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). It should be noted, however, that although some medications show promise, results are mixed, so they should not be considered a sole or reliable treatment.

If you believe you may have a shopping addiction, discuss possible treatments with your doctor. You may also find it helpful to get financial counseling, particularly if you have run up debts by spending. It is recommended that you abstain from use of checkbooks and credit cards, as the easy access to funding tends to fuel the addiction.

Shopping only with friends or relatives who do not compulsively spend is also a good idea, as they can help you to curb your spending. Finding alternative ways of enjoying your leisure time is essential to breaking the cycle of using shopping as way of trying to feel better about yourself. Remember, you are a worthwhile person, no matter how much or how little you own.

If you’ve found this website helpful, please click the Donate button.
The amount you donate is entirely up to you.
PLEASE CONSIDER…

If the information on this site helps you and you’d like to make a donation to StopStressingNow.com (to educated people about HIV), please click on the button below to make a contribution.
It looks like times have been tough on a lot people. But the beautiful thing is that people are still giving what they can. Sometimes it’s $5. Sometimes it’s $10. It’s always touching – the sincerity of our tribe. No matter what you can afford, we’ll hook it up with someone who truly needs it most. Money should never get in the way of our devotion to the cause.

Spread Love, not the virus!
I’m grateful for your support.

To View All Of Steven’s Video Blogs

Click Here
http://www.stopstressingnow.com/category/guest-bloggers/steven-diamond-video-blogs/

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!

There are many things to remember as we go through life. Over the years I have posted many different rules I try to live by.

What follows are five more that I think we should all keep in mind as we journey through.

1. Money cannot buy happiness, but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.

2. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastard’s name.

3. Help someone when they are in trouble, and they will remember YOU when they’re in trouble again.

4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.

5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.

As a bonus, here’s one more:
6. Don’t play with real Lightsabers!

Life is growth. If we stop growing, technically and spiritually, we are as good as dead. Just remember that Iron is full of impurities that weaken it; through forging, it becomes steel and is transformed into a razor-sharp sword.

We as Human beings develop in the same fashion.

If you’ve found this website helpful, please click the Donate button.
The amount you donate is entirely up to you.
PLEASE CONSIDER…

If the information on this site helps you and you’d like to make a donation to StopStressingNow.com (to educated people about HIV), please click on the button below to make a contribution.
It looks like times have been tough on a lot people. But the beautiful thing is that people are still giving what they can. Sometimes it’s $5. Sometimes it’s $10. It’s always touching – the sincerity of our tribe. No matter what you can afford, we’ll hook it up with someone who truly needs it most. Money should never get in the way of our devotion to the cause.

Spread Love, not the virus!
I’m grateful for your support.

To View All Of Steven’s Video Blogs

Click Here
http://www.stopstressingnow.com/category/guest-bloggers/steven-diamond-video-blogs/

StopStressingNow.com - Connecting To Happiness!