I want to introduce you to our newest guest blogger. Dr. Eboni J. Baugh, Ph.D., CFLE She is an assistant professor of family life at the University of Florida. With both a masters degree and a PhD in marriage and family therapy,  she has thousands of contact hours with individuals, couples, and families on various relationship issues. As a certified family life educator, she has conducted research and trainings, created programs, and taught undergraduate and graduate courses on topics that relate to dating, marriage, parenting, and other aspects of family life.

It is with great pleasure that I introduce to you Dr. Eboni J. Baugh.

By Guest Blogger: Dr. Eboni J. Baugh.

It is common practice in all societies to refer to those who have passed on in symbolic ways.  In the U.S., the most recognizable representation is the date of someone’s life.  For example, my recently deceased cousin lived from 3/16/1957-12/20/2009.  At age 52 she died after living a life full of caring for others, being a great wife and mother, volunteering in the community, and operating her own business.  She left a mark on all those who came in contact with her and is missed by many.
When you die the entirety of your life is reduced to a dash between two numbers, your birth date and the date on which you die.  A simple dash will represent all of your life’s experiences, accomplishments, pitfalls, and lessons which occurred between those two dates.  Those people who did not know you will see the dash, but will be unaware of exactly who you were as a person.  Therefore, it is important to focus on what your dash will mean to you and those around you.
Have you ever wondered what your dash will symbolize?  What will people remember about you when looking at the line between your dates of birth and death?  I agree this is not the most pleasant topic to discuss, but it is important to consider what you would like to complete by the time your dash is written. Using this example, it is important to enhance your dash while you are living.  After asking yourself questions such as, “What mark will I leave?” and “How will my dash represent my life and the lives of others?” focus on things you can do now to affect the future.

Follow these steps to enhance the quality of your life’s dash:
Create a bucket list – Most people have heard of a list of things to do before you die and many of you may already have one.  If not, take time to write down those things you would like to do if you had the chance.  Be it travel, learn a new skill, or jump out of an airplane, create your list and make a consorted effort to cross things off on a regular basis.
Practice honesty – Vowing to be truthful is difficult, but well worth the effort.  The people around you may have to adjust to the “new you” and may be offended by your honesty.  But in the end, being honest to yourself and others relieves a ton of guilt, anxiety, and stress from your life.
Strengthen your relationships – Value those people who bring something positive to your life and distance yourself from those who don’t.  Take the time to let those around you know how you feel.  Cherish the friends and family members who are genuine and have your best interest at heart by spending time working on those relationships.
Live each day like it was your last – Using the above steps, celebrate life.  Appreciate life’s experiences both good and bad.  Make time for yourself to work on your bucket list, decrease levels of stress and anxiety, and focus on your own needs.  Enjoy who you are and who you will become.
Simplify your life – In the hustle and bustle of everyday life most of us are over-worked, over-scheduled, and over-stressed.  We have more commitments than we have time, money, energy, or desire.  Take inventory of your life and rid yourself of unnecessary clutter and stress.  Learning to say no and putting your needs first will help with this step.

For more information on Dr. Eboni J. Baugh – http://theauthenticrelationship.blogspot.com/

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