Many of my callers both on my radio show and on my relationship advice line have wanted to know why men cheat. Tiger Woods, former presidential candidate John Edwards and Kobe Bryant are but a few of the high profile men who have cheated. But you don’t have to be rich and famous to have this problem. It has nothing to do with money. In fact, the simple truth is that many men cheat because of the adventure it creates from an otherwise boring or routine life.
Recently, while having lunch with a dear friend of mine the topic of “Why men cheat” came up in our conversation. He is a private detective and told me that 90% of his clients today are spouses who are suspicious of a mate that is cheating. I was shocked when he told me that if a spouse is truly suspicious in their heart of hearts that the other is cheating, they are usually 95% correct. He has investigated thousands of cases over the past 25 years. So I began an investigation of my own and looked into the top 5 reasons your hubby or significant other might be on the prowl.
One of the worst relationship mistakes which, unfortunately, is quite popular today, is believing that one should be a completely open book to one’s partner or prospective partner. While being honest to one’s partner is positive, some people fail to realize that honesty does not mean giving their partners every single detail of their lives. Although this can create unnecessary jealousy and resentment, it can go even further. People who develop this habit fail to realize that people are intended to have some degree of privacy. This includes certain experiences from one’s past and personal life, as well as thoughts and feelings. While people who make this mistake often believe that it encourages communication, it usually backfires. “Telling all,” and prodding one’s partner to do the same, strips away the essential sense of privacy which every person needs for himself or herself. Another destructive relationship mistake covers those who are not familiar enough with the concept of a “personal life.” In order for a relationship to be strong and healthy, it is essential to not “invite” other people into it. Unfortunately, many people do not understand that by sharing personal details about their relationships with their friends or family members they are actually weakening the relationship.